Portal: The Flash Game

Piece of cake my ass...

Remember Shift? The game that had stupid references? Well, guess what-this game IS the reference.
Controls were very annoying and the graphics sucked hardcore arse, but besides that, it's like the game. Very entertaining...if you don't mind graphics and controls.

Pros: Like the game
Cons: Gay controls and animation

Overall: Shift is much more fun than this. 85%

The Visitor

O' Kurt Russell, where art thou?

The Visitor is an awesome point/click adventure about a parasite that lands on earth...with gory results. Grosser than Dark Cut, The Visitor had some violent and EWWW parts, but besides that, it was a short puzzle that entertained me- for a long time. Puzzle Pros will enjoy the animation and try to find all secret endings, while Puzzle Noobs will have a good time checking out the awesome animation.

Pros: Puzzle Lovers and Puzzle Haters can love this game, nice animation, puzzling but not omfgwtfiswrongwiththisgame
Cons: Very, very bloody.

Overall: A must try...but there will be blood. 98%

Thing Thing 4

Twice the number, twice the shit

Remember the legendary 'Thing Thing' series? I don't care if it's a legend-Thing Thing just plain sucks.
The newest installment pits you as the guy from the other games trying to escape from the little shithole he's stuck in. There's no more recoil problems, which made this game pretty breezy...besides the fact that this game is Lagatopia Central. No matter how uber your comp is, this crap lags. So here's a question for you: would you rather play Crysis, the hottest game on the market, or Thing Thing 4, the laggiest crap ever created?

Pros: Better graphics, no more gay recoil
Cons: LAGGY LAND, not worth playing at all
Overall: Unless you're a Thing Thing die-hard or some dick without a life, don't play this crappy game at all. 25%

WhiteboardWar: ChopRaider

Just like 'Nam and Saigon eh?

In this fun little game, you're a little whiteboard chopper running around shooting at turrets and bombing war factories. Simple, fun, and fast. Like a search-and-destroy team.

Pros: simple, fun, fast
Cons: cheesical graphics, not much lasting appeal

Overall: WhiteboardWar: ChopRaider is a fun game, but don't expect to become addicted to it. 90%

Warlords: Call to Arms

Warcraft or Warcrap?

Warlords: Call to Arms is an exciting strategy game from Ben Olding. Choose from 9 different races and 25 campaigns to battle it out for conquest!
This game had fairly awkward controls, but once you get the hang of them, you should be able to own a couple easy challenges! Upgrades and buying units were very common throughout Warlords, which made me feel up to date with the battles getting harder and harder. The graphics are lame, but this definitely is not crap.

Pros: Fun, lets you adapt to harder battles
Cons: Crap graphics, awkward controls

Overall: No Warcraft, but very far ahead of Warcrap. 90%

Mindscape

Is this platformer worth risking your sanity for?

Please play Mindscape: the most insane platformer ever created. Collect stupid stuff and find secret items before you go insane. First off: The character seemed stupid, and would walk towards enemies while in midair. And the game doesn't tell you if you can change angles on which platforms.
Pros: Fun, creative, cool music
Cons: INSANELY ANNOYING, stupid character, time consuming, laggy

Overall: Mindscape gets a 75%. This game is very unique, but is so fucked up, you'll be wishing you could blow your brains out instead.

April Fools Day!

Have you gotten Rick Rolled yet?
Anyway, I have sad news. Yesterday at 5:00 a.m. Fancy Pants 2 was taken off all flash game websites. I searched in vain for Fancy Pants 2, but found nothing!
Okay, that was a bad April Fools prank so, uh April Fools!